Create a New Heart in Me

Ethiopian Traditional Dress

2010-02-15T10:58:00.000-08:00

Thanks to a dear friend of Eva's who brought this beautiful Ethiopian traditional dress back from Ethiopia! It was a wonderful gift and very timely, as Eva's birthday is this weekend and she wants to wear her dress to her party. Doesn't she look beautiful!

Basketball

2010-02-12T08:29:00.000-08:00

Eva has learned to play basketball and is really enjoying being a part of her school's team!

Braids, braids and more braids!

2010-01-22T10:42:00.000-08:00

Eva has a talent for braiding hair. She can sit in front of the TV and braid her hair into a beautiful masterpiece, with no mirror! I love to see the different looks she creates for herself each day.

Lately she has been braiding anybody's hair she can... including her brothers! (they are good sports).

Eva has a lot of dreams for her future, and she is beginning to set goals for herself. One dream she has is to be able to go back to Ethiopia one day and build a large house, big enough for families to live together in if they have no place to live. She also wants to have a "clothes closet" for the kids so that everyone has a pair or shoes... she wants to have a daycare and school on her property so parents can go to work and the kids have a safe place to stay. She wants the kids to have enough food so they won't be hungry. She really has so many details thought out!

Eva has been thinking about ways to start making money and saving up for this dream, and thinks she might like to start a hair braiding business. The other day Eva said to me, "Mom, I'm blessed, aren't I? God has a plan for me because he brought me to America and gave me opportunity." Yes, sweetie. You are blessed... and you are a blessing. We are blessed because of you.

Let it Snow!

2010-01-11T11:00:00.000-08:00

This past Saturday the sun was out and it was beautiful outside! Eva , dad and Pelé went out to play in the snow. Eva is still getting used to the cold weather and I had to remind her she could not wear her flip flops out to play and she needed a coat! She really enjoys the cold weather and playing in the snow... she is also learning how to snowboard!

Family Christmas Party

2009-12-20T08:06:00.000-08:00

Traits of Successful Adoptive Families

2009-12-03T05:30:00.000-08:00

I ran across this article posted on the Focus on the Family website. It's filled with encouragement and hope for those of us still learning and growing through the adjustment stages. I want to share it in hopes it will encourage someone else:

Traits of Successful Adoptive Families

By Debi A. Grebenik, Ph.D.

The adoption journey is resplendent with unforeseen detours, mountaintop experiences, formidable challenges — and magnificent views of God's grace all along the way. Without preparation, this journey can be more than challenging. With awareness and planning, the journey can be one that promotes growth, blessings and healing for all involved. Here are a few things you will need for a successful adoption journey.

The adoption journey begins with a commitment for life. Similar to the vows taken in marriage, the adoption process demands commitment in sickness and in health, and for richer or for poorer. Adoptive parents must begin their journey faithfully and fearlessly. As the apostle James exhorts: "Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him" (James 1:12). As adoptive parents stay the course and complete the journey, they experience the blessings that God promises.

The adoption journey is a walk by faith and must be approached with the same faithful attitudes and fearless abandon that God requires of every aspect of your Christian walk. Faith is imperative. In Exodus 14:13-14, soon after the people of Israel escaped from Egypt, they questioned Moses and God as they faced the fear of their imminent death in the desert. "Do not be afraid," Moses answered them, "Stand firm and you will see the deliverance the Lord will bring you today. The Egyptians you see today you will never see again. The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still" (Exodus 14:13-14). You, too, may experience difficult times when you wonder why God has brought you on this journey. From the very beginning, adoptive parents must acknowledge their fears, embrace a fearless love, stand firm and still and trust God.

What does it take to embrace a fearless love? You began your journey of adoption with a heart of love, of course, focused on the child who was to come into your home. You prepared your home, your family and your finances — but perhaps without looking at your own heart first. Yet this internal journey is a crucial part of the process that cannot be overlooked.

Real love allows you as the adoptive parent to examine your own fears. Only in your confrontation of these fears can a fearless love be grown. It takes courage to ask those difficult questions about the fears that reside deep within your spirit. "There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love" (1 John 4:18).

As we lay our fears at the feet of Jesus, He is able to love us with His perfect love, and out of that overflow we can love our children unconditionally.

Your faith is what gives you this foundation of love and commitment, coupled with the model of selflessness that parenting demands. We know from Scripture that "Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress" (James 1:27). For many, perhaps even you, adoption — looking after orphans — is a direct expression of personal faith and obedience to God.

Without this foundational faith as part of the journey, you may end up on a detour as you attempt to implement the world's wisdom. With a heart of faith you can find the wisdom that God desires to give you as a parent to your particular child.

You may encounter unplanned and unexpected obstacles in your journey as your child exhibits manipulation, defiance, aggression, depression and other challenging behaviors. Unconditional love provides the highway for this journey. You need faith in a loving Father so that you can love your adopted children in their healing journey.

Faith is staying power when love wanes. It enables you to see your children's needs from God's perspective and — despite various stressors and distractions — successfully stay in the journey for the long haul.

Thanksgiving Photos

2009-12-01T10:44:00.000-08:00

Thankful for family!

Thankful for what I am learning...

2009-11-25T06:10:00.000-08:00

I am thankful for so many things. These past few months as we have begun to mold into a new family have been filled with so many emotions... ups and downs, joys and tears. I am thankful for them all because I have learned so much about God's love for me. I use to think I understood grace... I know what that is now. I used to think I understood God's unconditional love... I know more of what that is now. I understand that the expectation of perfection is from the enemy... this expectation robs us of our joys, peace and purpose.

Here are some more things I am learning:

You say: 'It's impossible'

God says: All things are possible

(Luke 18:27)

You say: 'I'm too tired'
God says: I will give you rest
(Matthew 11:28-30)

You say: 'Nobody really loves me'
God says: I love you
(John 3:1 6 & John 3:34 )

You say: 'I can't go on'
God says: My grace is sufficient
(II Corinthians 12:9 & Psalm 91:15)

You say: 'I can't figure things out'
God says: I will direct your steps
(Proverbs 3:5-6)

You say: 'I can't do it'
God says: You can do all things
( Philippians 4:13)

You say: 'I'm not able'
God says: I am able
(II Corinthians 9:8)

You say: 'It's not worth it'
God says: It will be worth it
(Roman 8:28 )

You say: 'I can't forgive my self'
God says: I Forgive you
(I John 1:9 & Romans 8:1)

You say: 'I can't manage'
God says: I will supply all your needs
( Philippians 4:19)

You say: 'I'm afraid'
God says: I have not given you a spirit of fear
(II Timothy 1:7)

You say: 'I'm always worried and frustrated'
God says: Cast all your cares on ME
(I Peter 5:7)

You say: 'I'm not smart enough'
God says: I give you wisdom
(I Corinthians 1:30)

You say: 'I feel all alone'
God says: I will never leave you or forsake you
(Hebrews 13:5)

My grandmother's favorite Bible verse sits on my desk and reminds me daily of how God is in all of the details of my life. For this I am so thankful! Thank you Lord for the family you have given me!

"We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28

Happy Thanksgiving!

We have two 13 year olds!

2009-11-16T05:31:00.001-08:00

Last week Noah turned 13! We now have two 13 year olds in the house! We celebrated by going to dinner with grandma and papa. Noah chose Joe's Crab Shack where he could order a "Bucket of Crab Legs" (I was hoping he would choose McDonald's or Pizza Hut as his birthday dinner choice, but he has sophisticated tastes!). After dinner, we returned home for cake and ice cream and presents. Check out this awesome Rainbow cake I saw on another families blog.... it was so much fun to make and to eat! (Here is the recipe link: rainbow cake). Happy Birthday, Noah!

Soccer!

2009-11-16T05:20:00.001-08:00

Eva loves soccer and has asked to play on a team since arriving to our house. We found the perfect solution: an indoor co-ed team of 13 year olds that plays once a week. Eva's plays midfield for her team called the Vicious Fishes. She is really fast and dad is already encouraging her to go our for the school track team this spring!

Pumpkin Time!

2009-10-25T18:41:00.001-07:00

Today we got our pumpkins and carved them... Eva's first pumpkin carving experience!

Gladney Humanitarian Aid Video

2009-10-19T07:18:00.000-07:00

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We are grateful to our adoption agency, Gladney, and to the individual people who work for Gladney, for all they did to help our daughter come home and to facilitate and care for our daughter during her transition into our family.

If you feel your heart being called to help the orphans of this world, there are so many ways you can get involved to make a difference.... the need is too great to ignore.

"The place where God calls us to... is where our hearts deepest gladness meets the world's greatest need."

2009-10-05T11:01:00.000-07:00

Orphan Sunday from Christian Alliance for Orphans on Vimeo.

Our Newest Blessing

2009-09-26T07:08:00.000-07:00

Eva has been with our family for one month today! She has blessed our family in so many ways. I am so proud of her, Nathan and Noah for how everyone is adjusting. We love you, Sweetie... you are amazing!

My Three Blessings

2009-09-25T05:39:00.000-07:00

"Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God."
~ I John 4:7

Family Photo Shoot

2009-09-17T09:41:00.001-07:00

My dear friend, Julie, offered to take some family photos of us this past Sunday at the park. We had so much fun! Thank you, Julie for the wonderful gift!

Freed to Visit Orphans (Ethiopia)

2009-09-11T08:25:00.000-07:00

"Religion that is pure and undefiled before God, the Father, is this: to visit orphans and widows in their afflication, and to keep oneself unstained from the world." JAMES 1:27

The word for "visit" in James 1:27 means "to look after, care for."

Our First Week Together!

2009-09-04T08:27:00.000-07:00

It's hard to believe that Eva has been with us for week... it seems like we have been together much longer! We love her so much... she has come into our lives like a burst of sunshine. She has a contagious laugh and the biggest smile that lights up a room. We have nicknamed her "Sweetie".

Eva loves to cook and I am so excited about that! I also love to cook, so together we have been making Ethiopian food (we even found some teff at a store and tried to make some authentic Injera, but it was a dark teff and the injera was too heavy. I think we will stick with the flour + wheat flour version.) I was surprised how she has remembered recipes and quickly put together the most delicious wat (spicy and good!). She makes great scrambled eggs with onion, and she loves raw jalapeños with salt. We've made cookies and homemade pizza, too.

Eva is a great hair braider and stylist! She has braided Noah's hair and last night braided mine... I've never had cornrows in my hair, but I really like them! She has this great technique that she said the girls in Kechene discovered for their hair: she boils flax seeds until a goo or gel forms and then puts that on small stands of hair and wraps that hair around her finger until a cute bouncy curl appears... it's so cute! (see photo above)

She also likes swimming! We have been to a nearby lake and she has even gone fishing with her brother and cousins. She loves, loves, loves music! And she is great with technology... she says she would like to be a computer teacher someday. She is a beautiful and sweet girl who has blessed our lives in so many ways. We thank God for sending us our daughter!

Our New Daughter, Eva Hiwot Gary

2009-08-16T19:53:00.001-07:00

We arrived in Fort Worth, Texas Friday night and met our daughter, Eva, first thing Saturday morning! We are in love with her! She is such a sweetheart!

It's Official... we have a daughter!

2009-08-07T14:27:00.000-07:00

This has been a very busy summer for our family... we just returned from a medical mission trip to Guatemala and Honduras this past Monday. It was an amazing trip and such a blessing to see God at work there. While there, we received via email the news we had been waiting for... all of our documents were signed and we were officially accepted to adopt our daughter!

Our daughter is 13 years old and currently living in Texas, but is from Ethiopia. We are adopting her out of the foster care system. Yesterday we were able to talk with her on the phone and it was so precious! I just wanted to reach through the phone and hug her! At the end of our conversation we were able to exchange phone numbers, so last night we texted each other 'good night'. My heart melted this morning when I received a text saying, "good morning mom!". I just can't wait to bring her home!

We are flying down to spend the weekend with her next weekend and then she will be brought up to her new home in Michigan a few days after that... we are thrilled and thanking God for His goodness!!

Approved in our state... on to the next

2009-06-11T16:52:00.000-07:00

Today was a great day concerning all of our paperwork! Our Home study had been completed in Michigan a few weeks ago, and we were just waiting on the criminal clearances. Mine came back within a few weeks, but Mike's took about 7 weeks. We were anxious to get them so that we could have final approval in Michigan and then turn everything in to our agency in Texas for approval there. God is good and his timing is always perfect! Everything came in today and we mailed it all down to Texas AND we received a current photo of our daughter – she is beautiful! We can't wait to meet her!

"But these things I plan won't happen right away. Slowly, steadily, surely, the time approaches when the vision will be fulfilled. If it seems slow, wait patiently, for it surely will take place. It will not be delayed." ~ Habakkuk 2:3

"Scared" by Tom Davis

2009-06-09T14:51:00.000-07:00

Since I have been so impacted by two of Tom Davis's books, Fields of the Fatherless and Red Letters, I am anxious to read his latest novel, Scared.

An excerpt from an interview with Tom Davis...

My passion is driven from the core belief that not only can everyone in the West do something to help children trapped in poverty, they must. God’s kingdom comes when God’s people tackle issues like these and change the circumstances because of their love. We are the answer, that’s why we must act.

You can order Scared here.

God's Timing

2009-05-21T19:33:00.000-07:00

I can't even believe that we are at the point that I am able to blog and tell people that we are in the process of adopting! This all started back in 2007, after God grabbed ahold of my heart in a big way. It was adoption month and I had listened to interviews all month long on Focus of the Family, an interview in particular with Steven Curtis Chapman. I had also just finished reading Tom Davis' book, "Fields of the Fatherless" (which shines a bright light on the true meaning of living out the Gospel – God commands us to care for those who desperately need provision and protection: the orphan, the stranger and the widow). My great friend, Kathy, and I met for breakfast one morning in November '07 and I think we stayed talking in that booth until lunchtime. Both of us had felt the call to adopt an orphan and were comparing notes and so excited about what God was going to do. We both knew that God had called us to an older child, but had no idea the route he would use to get us there. In a very short time after that breakfast meeting, Kathy and her family discovered their route: God had led them to adopt a sibling group of 3 teens from Ethiopia. Their story can be read here: The Wolfe children came home in Nov. 2008, and we love them as family!

God was slower in showing us the route he would use for us, but everything began to unfold just last month when we visited the Wolfe family over spring break. I can't share all of the details yet, but I can say that I am confident that God's hand is in this!
"Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not." Jeremiah 33:3

We have completed our home study which included our FBI fingerprinting, doctor records for the family, vet records for the pets, bank records, biographies, floor plans of our home, etc. We need to be approved in Michigan and the state we are adopting out of, so it takes a bit longer, but everything has actually moved along very quickly.

I am reminded again and again that God is always in control and his timing is always perfect!

Kebebtsehay Children's Home

2008-11-22T18:53:00.000-08:00

We are thrilled to be a part of an online group who has committed to sponsoring orphans through Children's Hope Chest at the Kebebtsehay (pronounced Keb-a-bet-sa-high) Children's Home in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia. In January we will receive information on the child we will be sponsoring! There are more orphans who still need sponsors, so if you are interested let me know and I will direct you to the person who can help you get started! What a privilege this is to our family!

2008-08-18T06:16:00.000-07:00

GUATEMALA 2008

2008-07-22T05:18:00.000-07:00

On June 14, 2008, a team of 8 of us from Connexions Church in Dexter, MI went to San Juan Sacetepéquez on a mission trip. This is our 2nd year going, and we are continuing to build relationships with the Mayans. Our goal is to have an ongoing relationship where we can learn and share with each other. Enjoy this glimpse into the people I have come to cherish...

Seeing Clearly

2008-07-22T05:13:00.000-07:00

This is one of the children that we were able to fit with a pair of donated glasses. She was so happy when she found the glasses that worked for her!

God's Glasses

2008-07-21T19:18:00.000-07:00

I finally was able to sort through hundreds of photos and put them together into a video that we will use to thank our supporters and donors. These people have captured my heart.

For those who don't know the story of our journey, let me just say that without a doubt, we know God had a plan. We took 500 pairs of donated eyeglasses with us, all read and coded with strengths by local optometrists. When we checked in in Detroit, our luggage was checked straight through to Guatemala City, even though we had to change planes and go through immigration in Mexico City. However, when we arrived in Mexico City we had a few snags... first we landed the same time an Air Canada plane landed, and the line in Immigration took over an hour. Next, we needed to find Taca Airlines and needed to obtain our boarding passes before getting on our flight, which turned into a circus. Needless to say, we missed our flight. After much negotiating and prayer, Mexicana Airlines allowed our group to get on one of their flights, but our luggage was held up in customs. This turned into a 5 hour nightmare! The customs agents made us open all of our luggage (16 suitcases, all packed with mission supplies like vitamins, dental kist and the 500 pairs of eyeglasses!). After opening the vitamins and tasting them all, they saw the eyeglasses and wanted to "tax" us $800 on the glasses! Eventually the price came down to $400, then $104, and then $80, and when we went to get cash from the ATM to pay them, the card didn't work! So we told the agents we were just leaving the glasses. Before leaving, Mike said to them, "You know, it's a shame... these glasses were all donated to us and we are bringing them into this region to help people. These glasses aren't OUR glasses, they're God's glasses." It must have touched one of the agents, because she then told us we could have them back as long as we could present our boarding passes on Mexicana. The glasses got a personal escort to the check-in counter by a customs agent.

The interesting thing is that because we missed our flight, we were able to meet a US medical team on our new flight that was going to the village right next to San Juan Sacatepéquez. They told us to send over any people we encountered that needed medical attention, as they were there for 2 weeks.

Well.... we soon realized that God had a plan for us to miss our initial flight and to get held up in customs (he always knows better than us!). During our week at the church in San Juan Sacatepéquez, and during our eyeglass clinic, we met several people that we referred to the clinic. Many, many people were blessed by the glasses they received. It was a pure joy to be there and to watch someone put on a pair of glasses and see clearly for the first time! We not only fitted adults and elderly, but many children. One little girl will forever be etched in my mind... when we finally found the perfect pair of glasses for her, she just beemed and hugged us all so tight. God is good!

Trying to Debrief

2008-07-03T19:34:00.000-07:00

Our Guatemala mission team recently returned from a week in San Juan Sacatepéquez, Guatemala. It's always hard to come back home and try to put into words the things you have seen and experienced to other people. It takes awhile to sort your thoughts, debrief and articulate how you have been impacted. I am going to try to do that here, by sorting out the stories one at a time, and taking time to reflect on how God is speaking to me and what I am learning. I know one thing – I have been changed.